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Mango Torres Since my uprooting and ensuing move to Beaufort, NC, I have had dual research interests. Primarily, I am interested in Optimum Mailman Taunting Behavior (OMTB). I have found that the limiting factor to this behavior is the distance to the target due to the imminent threat of mace spray. While my incessant barking significantly increases the metabolic heart rate of the mailman (p-value < .005) and the target subsequently distances himself from the premises, my ability to approach the target shrinks by a factor of 3.25. Future research in this area will be to examine the effect of the Puppy-dog stare as first proven by Fred et. al (1932). The null hypothesis is that increased use of the Puppy-dog stare will have no effect on luring the target closer for the kill. While I have enjoyed my life here at the Lab, I feel that I am ready for more global endeavors. I have decided that my owner Leigh should accept the positon offered to her in New Zealand. We are moving there in January 2008, and I am very excited to see all the new sites. I will miss the Duke Marine Lab, but I know that Piper will keep a good eye on the place for me while I am gone. Literature cited: Fred, Bingo, Maggie and Buddy. 1932. How we survived the lean times of the depression: Use of the Puppy-dog stare to attract human targets. Dog times, 35(6): 52-67. Piper Good
Recent Publications: Synthetic vs. natural wool felt on tennis balls: Why only the real thing will do. 2004 Fetch. 3: 34-43.
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Secondly,
I have broadened my interests away from a solely scientific perspective
and am now examining the social aspects of policy change. I have founded
a revolutionary organization dedicated to achieving interspecies equal
rights. We currently have a bill before congress to establish laws protecting
the rights of all species effectively ending animal segregation. In
the mean time we have made some progress on the semi-inhabited island
of Pivers, in Beaufort, NC. The current policy on the island bans all
pets, yet Dr. Michael Orbach, the director of the Duke Marine Lab situated
on Pivers Island, has opened his eyes to the inherent benefits of pets,
primarily of the canine species. Our proposal of improved dog policies,
co-authored by myself and Meeko, has been submitted and approved for
public comment by the island community. If you are interested in joining
our cause, visit our website at www.equalrights4alldogs.org.
My research focuses on the physical attributes of balls. I am interested in understanding the optimal material and size requirements for a good game of fetch. While other dogs view this as a mundane opportunity to get exercise and roll in the grass, I take fetching very seriously. A ball must be a perfectly round sphere with no imperfections to allow for just the right spin through the air. The ball felt must retain moisture yet still bounce appropriately even when soggy or rainy conditions persist. Ball bounciness should provide for 10-12 foot height when thrown directly at the ground but should lose bounce quickly with additional contact with the ground. Additionally, while there are many schools of thought on this subject, I also prefer a playing surface that is dry and hard although not too dusty. (I hate dust in my eyes.) Grass should be well maintained and cut to 2 and 1/4 inches for optimal play.
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